10.28.2012

Snow-Spun Promises


I watch them with close eyes.  The first big snow has fallen; that magical snow.  As they fall to the ground, bellies down, pressed against snowflakes and crunchy fallen leaves, and roll around without a care in the world, pure happiness splayed across their frozen little faces, I breathe out and settle into the moment.

Suddenly what comes to my mind is a visual of my hands wet with earthy clay, spinning, feeling.  Older and more wrinkly, my hands, perhaps.  Then my mind reeled back to an article I recently read about a four day cheese making course at a farm in Vermont.  As I read I could almost see myself arriving there, ready to learn, needy for a tiny morsel of time to remind myself that I am still me.

A brewing fight over snow shovels and flying snowballs brings me back to the present.  Before taking one step forward in my mama-shoes I make a promise to myself.  I will find a local pottery class.  I will pack my bags and head to a farm and learn a new skill.  Maybe even in Vermont.  

As I crouch on the frozen earth looking up at Theo and Sully as the mediator, mother, friend, I see perfect snowflakes frozen on their eyelashes.  Heavenly little promises.  Yes, I whisper to myself, I will get there.

6 comments :

  1. Yes, you will get there.

    And I hope you don't mind me saying that I'm glad my boys weren't the only ones eating snow. ;-)

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  2. I always seem to come back to ceramic classes when trying to find myself again. It's a habit I formed in college. Your post makes me want to find a class while I'm on baby sabbatical.

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  3. YES! (to all of the truth and beauty here)

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  4. yes. i've made little promises to myself as well knowing that one day the time will be right. until then, trying to enjoy all that motherhood entails.

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  5. Cheese making, how cool? Love the snow pics so early... here in AL the snow is sparse each winter. It feels like this year will bring more than usual, though!

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  6. loving that third pic down.....
    and I'm agreeing with Habit of Being's comment too.
    XO

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